Mindful and Sensual
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to Still Water Dharma Topics)
Dear Still Water Friends,
This
Thursday Evening, after our meditation period, we will recite together
the Five Mindfulness Trainings and focus our dharma discussion on the
third training, sexual misconduct.
The original formulation of
the training, from the time of the Buddha, was simply: "I undertake the
training to refrain from sexual misconduct." (The Pali phrase used, kamesu micchacara, can also be translated as "not to indulge in sensual desire in the wrong way.")
This
training, like the other trainings -- not to kill, lie, steal, or
become intoxicated-- established for students of the Buddha
self-imposed boundaries of acceptable behavior.
In the
Saleyyaka Sutra, the Buddha gave some concrete examples of how a man
might engage in sexual misconduct: "he has intercourse with
women who are protected by their mother, father, mother and father,
brother, sister, or relatives, who have a husband, who are protected by
law, or with those already engaged.” (Translation by Bhikku Bodhi).
Following
this tradition of clarifying sexual misconduct, the training we read
(given below) focuses especially on what is the wrong way.
Most
of the Buddha's teachings, however, were not about "the wrong
way", but about "the right way," "the wholesome way", "the noble
way". And the most highly esteemed person, according to the
Buddha, was one who not only promotes his or her own good, but
encourages others to develop themselves, to free themselves from
suffering. (See the Chavlata Sutra below).
Our discussion will start from this "promotion of good" perspective with this question:
In
terms of sexual behavior, or sensual behavior more generally, are
there ways of thinking, speaking, and acting that
you cultivate in your own life and that you encourage
others to cultivate in theirs?
You
are invited to join with us. The best times to join our Thursday evening gatherings are just
before the beginning of our 7 p.m meditation, just before we begin
walking meditation (around 7:25), and just after our walking meditation
(around 7:35).
Warm wishes,
Mitchell Ratner
Senior Teacher
The Third Mindfulness Training:
Aware
of the suffering caused by unmindful sexual behavior, I am committed to
cultivating sexual responsibility and respect in myself and in others.
I
will learn ways to protect the physical and emotional integrity of
individuals, couples, families, and society. If I choose to engage in
sexual relations, I will do so only in a loving and committed
relationship. To preserve the happiness of myself and others, I am
determined to respect my emotional, physical, and legal commitments to
my partner, as well as commitments among other persons. I will do
everything in my power to protect children, women, and men from sexual
abuse and to prevent couples and families from being broken by
unmindful sexual behavior. I will be mindful of loneliness and sexual
suffering in myself and others and I will be compassionate and
nonjudgmental concerning the sexual behavior of others.
This is the third of the Five Mindfulness Trainings. Have I made an effort to study and practice it during the past few weeks?
Chavalata Sutta -- Wood from a Pyre
Translated from the Pali by Acharya Buddharakkhita
"Monks,
these four kinds of persons are to be found existing in the world.
Which four? One who is engaged in promoting neither his own good nor in
promoting the good of another; one who is engaged in promoting
another's good but not in promoting his own good; one who is engaged in
promoting his own good but not in promoting the good of another; and
one who is engaged in promoting his own good and also in promoting the
good of another.
"Just as, monks, a piece of wood from a pyre,
burnt at both ends and in the middle fouled with dung, serves neither
for fuel in the village nor for timber in the forest, so in the same
way, monks, is such a person, I say, who is engaged in promoting
neither his own good nor in promoting the good of another.
"Monks,
there is the person who is engaged in promoting the good of another but
not in promoting his own good. Of these two individuals the latter is
superior. Monks, there is the person who is engaged in promoting his
own good but not in promoting the good of another. Of these three
individuals he is superior. Monks, there is the person who is engaged
in promoting his own good and also in promoting another's good. Of
these four individuals he is the foremost, the chief, the principal,
the best and the supreme.
"Just as, monks, from a cow comes
milk; from milk, curd; from curd, butter; from butter, ghee; from ghee,
the skimmings of ghee, and that is reckoned the best; even so, monks,
among these four individuals the person who is engaged in promoting his
own good and also the good of another is the foremost, the chief, the
principal, the best and the supreme. Monks, these are the four
individuals who are to be found existing in the world."