Life as an Ocean of Energetic Layers

posted in: Dharma Topics | 0

Dear Still Water Friends,

Life as an Ocean of Energetic Layers
June 28, 2007

Dear Friends,

Suddenly, in the last couple ofmonths I have becomeconscious of patterns in my life that have existed for years, perhapsdecades.One such pattern is my tendency to withdraw when I’m confronted with aseemingly intractable life problem. Instead of moving into acceptance,restingin my uncertainty, or tackling the problem head-on, my habit energy isto slideinto resignation. This tendency – call it a “grandenergy” – has been like along, low, slow-moving wave in my life. It’s one that Idon’t typically noticedirectly, but which has had stunning and profound effects on my way ofbeing.

Onthe other hand, my moods – like somewhat smaller, fastermoving waves – come and go over a period of weeks or days.Resentment becomesacceptance, grief flows into gratitude, determination withers touncertainty.

Andon a momentary (and quite impermanent) scale: a thought,a conversation, or an event can trigger a “spike”of anger, joy, sorrow, andother emotions.

Thething that hit me recently is that these larger-scaleenergies actually create a context within which my moods ebb and flow;andthose moods in turn affect my emotions. For example, my tendency towardwithdrawal makes it hard for me to stay with a difficult task (likewritingthis email), and so it’s difficult to maintain a mood ofexcitement andaspiration. And then someone says, “Peter, did you finish__________?” And Ireact with guilt because I dropped the ball. But I don’trealize in the momentthat the issue isn’t just the task or my mood thatday or my guilt – it’sall happening for a reason, a much bigger reason having to do with my“grandenergy.” And this seems so obvious on the one hand, and so huge on the other. 

Isee these energies as if they are waves upon waves on anocean. The little emotion waves ride on the big mood waves, the moodwaves rideon the grand energy waves, and it’s all a big dance ofenergies riding theirway through my life’s experience.

So this is a delightfulmetaphor, but what do I do with itnow? Can I learn to bring intentionality to my moods and emotions if Istayconscious of my grand energies? Perhaps you will come up with someinsights asyou think about your own waves. And maybe you’ll even sharethem this Thursdayat our discussion following our sitting.

I hope to see you there.

Warmest wishes,